Laws of the Ricer

THE LAWS OF THE RICER

Law#1-Pronounce N.O.S. as one word (NAWS).
Law#2-When you are outpowered, call people out with your friends car.
Law#3-Have an aftermarket body kit installed (Lips not included).
Law#4-Use of neons or L.E.D.'s to light up your car.
Law#5-Use an aftermarket tachometer...when your car already has a working stock tachometer in it.
Law#6-You must install a non-functional wing/spoiler on the back of your car.
Law#7-Names of performance parts on your car that you dont have.
Law#8-Claim to beat cars that your car is totally uncapable of beating.
Law#9-Magazine race.
Law#10-Install racing seats on a car that runs a 14 second or slower quarter mile.
Law#11-Listing stereo equiptment or any visual mod when listing all your performance mods.
Law#12-Believe that Honda invented VTEC.
Law#13-Putting sub-brand labels on your car...example:Honda emblems on an Acura, Audi on a VW..ect.
Law#14-Install an aftermarket duel-exhaust on a 4-cylinder.
Law#15-Make your exhaust sound like a lawn-mower.
Law#16-Buy a nitrous system just to purge.
Law#17-Using car donughts and calling them "skinnies".
Law#18-Mounting smaller tires to decrease gear ratio.
Law#19-Multi collored body panels.
Law#20-Claiming horse power and quarter mile times with out testing or proof.
Law#21-Talk about how fast your car will be once you buy and install all the parts.
Law#22-performing the ricer flyby
Law#23-fliping your hazard lights,during/after a loss or during a flyby
Law#24-subscribing to super street/sportcompact car
Law#25-boasting about your interior/power windows/sporty looks
Law#26-Say you lost because your car is running on a ****ty tune and needs to be tuned.......... when you're on the stock computer...
Law#27-rev @ every car on the road that will eat you(no matter what direction they are going)
Law#28-if some challenges you 2 a race you have 2 options
a.race and when you lose go to ws and lie your butt off
b.tell em they are a waste of time
Law#29-my clutch is slipping,
Law#30-If lose i missed a gear,
Law#31-or my vtec was set to low,
Law#32-when the vinyl work is worth more than the car,
Law#33-also calling the skinnies here is known as dookies,
Law#34-when someone does a neutral drop in an automatic,
Law#35-bouncing off the revlimiter more than once
Law#36-I started in 2nd intstead of 1st
Law#37-My shift light went off late
Law#38-I didnt catch posi trac on that one
Law#39-My shift nob came off (srt humor)
Law#40-Did you know green meant GO!
Law#41-My vtec juice light was flashing
Law#42-my trunk was weighed down from my 12s
Law#43-my strut bar snapped
Law#44-my neonlight valve stem covers are robbing hp
Law#45-I didnt double clutch like i should have
Law#46-If I didnt blow the welds on the intake i sure poop my pants on that one
Law#47-If the wing is bigger than the blechers at your local high school
Law#48-When the exhaust consist of coat hangers and jb weld
Law#49-Yeah its got about 5000 dollars invested in it ( and it looks like poop)
Law#50-Its a prototype that no one has (built from duct tape and blue glue and pvc piping)
Law#51-driving in and out of traffic with your vtak thinking you have a fast car
Law#52-Getting your #s from a g-tech or some other similar meter.
Law#53-using chicken wire as a mesh grill
Law#54-Remove your hubcaps and paint yer steelies to match the car
Law#55-Account at pepboys
Law#56-own both F+F and have ticket reserved for the third
Law#57-Cutting your factory springs to lower your car
Law#58-Having gauges that do not work
Law#59-When one car in the whole world runs 10s and you think your car is fast.
Law#60-Having a body kit and no plans on painting it
Law#61-When you double side tape parts to the car and expect them to hold up at 100 mph
Law#62-"Yeah its VTEC, but its not hooked up yet"
Law#63-When you consider primer as a color choice
Law#64-When you tell people it has a 9000 rpm redline and can only turn 6700
Law#65-58 if your name is Goki
Law#66-z3 fender flares on an import
Law#67-if you talk about owning a skyline someday and you drive a civic
Law#68-having windshield washer squirters with lights in them
Law#69-Cutting your factory springs to lower your car
Law#70-You refer as everything being JDM
Law#71-someone asks you if you have a turbo and you reply "not YET!"
Law#72-Tell people you are running nitrous,when its really N.O.S. octane booster.
Law#73-who the flip knows....driving around some highschool parking lot 3 hours after schools out trying to pick up chicks
Law#74-taking your 50whp civic to a dyno when it's stock
Law#75-When you manually shift an automatic
Law#76-Going to the dragstrip with slicks and running a 16.05 in the 1/8
Law#77-When you drive around months at a time with spare tires on the front and custom rims in the back.
Law#78-All you do is brag about how much of a street racer you are
Law#79-Asking about staggared fitment rims on a FWD car.
Law#80-When your car consist of a GTR badge on the car and is not a skyline
Law#81-Its got a rotary motor in it and you drive a mustang
Law#82-you claim your car is fast then get butthurt so you claim your car is an autoX car.
Law#83-you post pics of your parents car and claim it for you own
Law#84-when you compare your $35k car to a $20k car
Law#85-List motor oil as a mod
Law#86-When your car has more torque in the lug nuts than in the motor
Law#87-list winshield wipers as a mod and carbon fiber pedals
Law#88-When your car has more than one squash air freshner in it
Law#89-When you transform your car into something else with a headlight swap and taillight swap
Law#90-When someone ask you if its mandrel bent or crush piping and you have no answer
Law#91-When you stick the rim and tire out further than the fenders and you use curb feelers to keep from messing them up.
Law#92-when your body kit is held on by sheet rock screws and thumb tacks
Law#93-If you "fat arm" out the window with a sideways cap.
Law#94-If you are 5'2 and you drive in the back seat
Law#95-when you have more switches than a hydralic car and have no hydralics
Law#96-If you have to beg your parents to drive the civic
Law#97-when you de-badge your GST ecplise of LX civic because its the suck model
Law#98-windshield sticker saying powered by....(127 @the crank yeah thats power)
Law#99-When one car in the whole world runs 10s and you think your car is fast.
Law#100-when your sn is qwerty
Law#101-You remove every piece of your interior and you still run 15's
Law#102-you have diamond plate floormats
Law#103-you have a racing harness on your stock civic lx seat
Law#104-you make your own intake out of pvc pipe
Law#105-you know what jdm means
Law#106-you have hubcaps that resemble rims
Law#107-you drive any korean car and "mod" it
Law#108-if you have an AEM license plate frame
Law#109-if you put 18, 19, or 20" rims on a sport compact.
Law#110-Japanese writing on a domestic car
Law#111-Put racing gas in ur stock civic lx
Law#112-If you spraypaint your interior
Law#113-if you don't make fun of ricers
Law#114-If you are getting angry while reading this list
Law#115-the local tow truck service is on speed dial
Law#116-the local performance shop is on speed dial
Law#117-someone yells got rice and your mom pulls up in the catering truck
Law#118-your in the performance shop to look @ poop you cant buy untill payday..and it never comes
Law#119-put lambo doors on
Law#120-You join CLUBRSX , not to goof on them, but because you actually think they are fast
Law#121-Calling your flat, bald street tires "Slicks"
Law#123-you drive in 1st gear 90% of the time so you can hear the vtec whine
Law#124-If you buy an srt design
Law#125-you have a bumper sticker that says drive it like you stole it
Law#126-your keychain says aem/tanabe/greddy/typeR/si/mugen/....
Law#127-you pla

lol so true so true. 

most of them are true

 VTAAAAAKKK!!!!!!

ok, if my car is a ricer, but i openly admit that its a ricer, and that i wanna get rid of it... does that make me a ricer too??

nope^

Most of it is true.... 

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dusty Eclipse

Law#137-You have a Vin Diesel poster

 
hahaha damn it im a ricer?!?

The vin deisel poster isnt as bad as your backstreet boys poster!!

I fit some of those as being a ricer too lol.. but my wing is stock and my car is fast and has only motor work and no visual so I guess im ok

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheAdvocate

The vin deisel poster isnt as bad as your backstreet boys poster!!

 
ahhh howd you know about that you stalker!!!! did you see my n'sync poster too?

i fall under a few of those... but i think alot of ppl fall under this one...
 
Law#105-you know what jdm means

Yah, I know... theres a few in there that I dont really agree with... but I didnt make it. In fact, the guy who made it is a bimmer enthusiast. I hate bimmers... but he had a good point on a lot of these.

Personally, I like BMW's between 95-02, especially the 325i.
But todays BMW's are just plain ugly, same with Mercedes.
Why are the Germans slacking in the design department?
 

aw man i drive my GSX like it's a stick when it's an auto = (
couldn't find an affordable stick GSX at the time and was to lazy to learn it...but now i wish i had a manual GSX
btw off topic but i saw an eclipse that had GT-R on it instead of the usual GS-T or GSX.  ah i was crackin up looking at the guys

hahaha hey! i drive my auto stick cuz im soooo used to engine break.... i cannot rely on brakes.... not after having my rabbit for some years 

WTF dude, Honduh did invent VTAAAAAKA! and it is better than a turbo since it's like a built in turbo minus the snail!!!!!!

3 series are like the Civic of the european motor world IMO. Same with the C class Mercedes. If any BMW is hot Id go with a 7 series...

i would be a ricer in several aspects lol :(

quote:

Install an aftermarket duel-exhaust on a 4-cylinder.

Dammit my car will have this...but it came stocck with it also so its all good.
 

quote:

you drive any korean car and "mod" it

I think joshewuhh might be in trouble on this one
 
Also if there was one on spending more money on body work than engine work then i would also fit that catagory
 

i don't wanna list how many of them apply to me... i'll be here all day and have the longest post in the history of this forum lol.     but on a mitsu sight no matter how hard anybody tries... i about 99.9% posative that everybody has at least one of the applying to them.

i got another one to add to the list..
 
if you believe that installing an a-pillar guage pod counts as a supporting mod for a turbo

ok, i have no life
3, 4, 13 -  don't agree with, 22 just for fun, 23 just for fun, 24 why?, 27 for fun, 71, 86 lol, 101, 105, 109, 118, 130, 140 :( its true, 147 what's wrong w/ that??     
not as long as i thought it would be.

HEYYY i have all three F+F dvds.  plus i think the only time u see honda emblems on a acura is in japan

i got one....
 
you have "body kitz rule" in your signature